i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize