Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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