i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer