I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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