she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
whose parrot is this?
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
