Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
