Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
