just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
