This is not my ceiling
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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