She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
