When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize