i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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