What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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