my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
that is very illegal...i love you.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
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