do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
