There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
