somebody snuck up and got me drunk
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Randomize
