I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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