God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
