Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Randomize
