I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I didn't notice because vodka
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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