We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Sext me about skeletons
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
