Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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