We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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