That's intense
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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