guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
