I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
