Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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