You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
