I forgot how hot balto sounded
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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