I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
