Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize