i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
i will never coherently bang her
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
