Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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