im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
My life is pants optional.
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