What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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