sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
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