we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
