too bad you live with your parents still
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Randomize