he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
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the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
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Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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