Jerry, you need to find god
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i wish my penis had a tongue
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Randomize
