im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize