Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
