in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get me chipped asap
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize