I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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