My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
