Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize