How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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