he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
