remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
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