About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Randomize
